Girls are silly. I'm silly.

They're so catty, and they just keep clawing and clawing.

I hate fighting. I hate conflict. Yes, every good story needs conflict. Well.. I suppose, I create it within myself more often than anything.

I try to avoid fighting with friends. In the past, this made me have like one or two huge fights with girls I was friends with. But now, I can't see ever fighting with any of them. Why? Well, I've grown up a little. I'm just not bothered by things that used to bother me. I accept my friends. And if they have a problem with me, I just walk away from it.

But girls are always causing drama, right? Honestly, I think it's because they're all too proud to admit that they are either: jealous, selfish, or hurt. Instead they attack, attack, attack! Rather than explain the REAL reason they are feeling upset.

I like to be honest about that stuff. No confusion. But with some people, that can even be difficult. In my experience, my words usually get twisted away from me, and start to mean something else. And that one... just makes me give up. What's the point? One a person is so locked into an idea, they aren't going to just up and change because I say: I love you and I care.

People are so frustrating! Don't they see that all this fighting is just a waste of time? Get down from your high horse or simply move on. If you stir drama, you care. You want to provoke something out of the other person. What's the god damn point?

I know, I'm ranting. But this is a good distraction from my fear of night. Instead focusing on the parts of the human race that I cannot stand. But, confession... I sometimes wish I could be like them. Believe me, I have tried. Some may even tell you I am just because one attempt seemed to go well.

But... I'm just not. Frankly, I just don't give a flying fuck. But I wish I did.

And I wish that I didn't have to think like this all the time. I wish that I could just be like "LOLZ LYF IS GR8!" all the freaking time. But I just can't! I'm always questioning, always seeking, always ignoring every day life to get a glimpse of eternity.